The Electric G-Wagen Is More Shock Than Awe, Apparently
Image Credit: Mercedes-Benz.
It appears the grand plan to electrify absolutely everything with four wheels, even the stuff that looks like it was designed with a set square and a vague understanding of aerodynamics, is hitting a bit of a snag. I'm talking, of course, about the venerable Mercedes G-Class, or G-Wagen if you're feeling nostalgic. Mercedes zapped it, gave it the full battery treatment, and called it the G580 with EQ Technology – a name that just rolls off the tongue… And the result? Let's just say the showrooms aren't exactly buzzing, unless it's from the unsold chargers.
Apparently, since its grand debut last April, the electrified brick - as the G580 is known - has found a handful of buyers. The numbers are so low, they make my golf handicap look respectable. Handelsblatt, a rather serious German publication not usually known for automotive comedy, reports that Mercedes executives are describing it as "sitting like lead at dealers" and a "complete flop." Ouch. In Europe, by the end of April this year, only around 1,450 brave souls had taken the plunge. South Korea? A paltry 61. And in China, the supposed nirvana for all things electric, only 58 units were sold. Fifty. Eight. Meanwhile, its petrol-slurping sibling is flying off the shelves, outselling the electric version seven to one. Seven!
Image Credit: Mercedes-Benz.
What's gone wrong? It's not the looks, that's for sure. Mercifully, Mercedes didn't try to turn it into a slippery bar of soap like some other electric SUVs I could mention. No, the G580 looks almost identical to the G-Wagen we all know and, for some inexplicable reason, adore. It's still got the aerodynamics of a small shed and dimensions that make parking a fun urban adventure – around 182 inches long, 76 inches wide (without mirrors, mind you), and a rather statuesque 78.2 inches tall. The wheelbase is a decent 113.8 inches. So, if it's not the iconic "designed by a child with a ruler" aesthetic, what is it?
For starters, let's talk about what makes an EV a good EV. Usually, you get a skateboard platform, batteries low down, a long wheelbase, and an interior that feels like a cathedral. The electric G? Not so much. It's built on a modified version of the regular G's ladder frame. This means interior space is pretty much the same as the gas guzzler, which was never exactly Tardis-like to begin with. And then there's the weight… We're talking somewhere in the region of 6,800 to 6,900 pounds.
Image Credit: Mercedes-Benz.
The first consequence of that weight is a range that we can only call pathetic. The EPA reckons it'll do about 239 miles on a full charge from its 116 kWh (usable) battery. Now, in the grand scheme of things, and for a vehicle shaped like a particularly stubborn breeze block, that might not sound too terrible. But for something costing $161,500 before you even glance at the options list, you'd expect to be able to cross a state or two without severe range anxiety.
And then there's the small matter of what an SUV is supposed to do: utility. The towing rating for this electric behemoth is a subject of much amusement and consternation. How much? Zero. Zilch. Nada. You can't even attach a bicycle rack. So, towing your prize-winning speedboat or that Airstream you bought in a moment of lockdown madness? Forget it.
Image Credit: Mercedes-Benz.
Under the floor, the G580 hides four electric motors, one for each wheel, kicking out a rather impressive 579 horsepower and a tree-stump-pulling 859 pound-feet of torque. Naught to 60 mph is dispatched in a claimed 4.6 seconds, which is brisk for something that weighs more than a small moon. But here's the rub: luxury buyers, the chaps and chapesses with the seriously deep pockets, still seem rather attached to the idea of a big, powerful petrol engine rumbling away. It's about status, the noise, the heritage. Even though the latest G550 has downsized from a V8 to an inline-six (the horror!), it's still perceived as the 'proper' G-Wagen by many.
Mercedes, to its credit, isn't entirely burying its head in the sand. They've already admitted that the EV transition might be a marathon, not a sprint, and have pledged to keep investing in good old internal combustion engines while still working on new electric models. One of those was supposed to be a "baby G-Class," an all-electric mini-me. But the German rumor mill is now suggesting that Mercedes is seriously mulling over giving this smaller G an actual engine or, more likely, a hybrid setup. Apparently, because it's based on their MMA platform (also found under the new CLA), this switcheroo is still possible.
Image Credit: Mercedes-Benz.
It just goes to show that electrifying an icon isn't as simple as swapping out the oily bits for a battery and some wires. The soul of a vehicle, especially one as important as the G-Wagen, is a tricky thing to replicate with silent electrons. Maybe the lesson here is that not every vehicle needs to be, or indeed should be, fully electric, especially if it compromises what made it special in the first place. Or maybe they just need to give it a sensible towing capacity and a range that doesn't make you plan your life around charging stations.
I'm still rooting for electric tech; I truly am. It's clever, it's often brilliant, and it's undeniably the future for a huge chunk of motoring. But maybe the path to that future needs a few more well-placed petrol stations for the icons that simply refuse to go quietly into the electric night. Or at least, make them good enough that we don't even miss the rumble. The jury is still very much out on the electric G. And by the sounds of it, they're not buying.
